Headaches

So, I had 3 migraines last week, probably triggered by the pregnancy hormones. I had Auntie Voodoo do a treatment on Saturday night and was headache free after a couple of hours. Until today.

This morning, it started as a dull ache in the back of my skull and escalated over several hours, even having another treatment. I ended up sleeping it off for a couple of hours after I cried and made hubby and kidlet slave over me (lol). Got up feeling 100% better.

Then I had some mint chocolate chip ice cream. Headache returned within 5 minutes just as bad as it was before I slept.

I realized today's headache wasn't preceded by any visual auras or disturbance, whereas my usual migraines are. I was eating chocolate just before it started, too, and when I had a bit more later (been craving it since last night), the headache intensified.

I think I'm sensitive to chocolate now -- at least while pregnant. I'm not going to have chocolate again for a good long while, if ever. I'm in too much pain. Owell, it'll help me not get fatter during the pregnancy, right?

UPDATE

All is well. Baby's heart is beating, it is wiggling like mad, and when I told the doctor I could feel it, he said it was entirely possible even if it's early. I cried as soon as we saw the heartbeat. I feel a lot better, even though I'm still spotty and crampy a bit ... I decided as long as I can feel Chuck wiggling (my co-workers call it that), I'm not going to worry about it. Even if I'm spotting.

WHAT is the POINT of a MIDWIFE? (RANT)

My spotting was still going yesterday, so I called the midwife's office yesterday. Twice. Left messages both times. I never did hear from them. The spotting slowed down a lot, looks like the last day of my period this morning, but I have had a bit of cramping. I called again this morning and told the receptionist what was going on and that they hadn't called me back yesterday. She got the nurses on the phone. The nurses said they never got my messages (BS) yesterday and then informed me that my MIDWIFE is no longer delivering BABIES and told me to go to the ER and then come in next week and see the OB. I'm just a bit pissed off. Because the OB she works with wouldn't discuss whether or not intercourse was safe for me (he got embarrassed when I brought it up!!!), I'm changing doctor's offices. I called an OB/GYN I'd seen about 10 or 11 years ago for an early miscarriage and he and his partners have delivered several of my nieces and nephews. I was crying of course, because this is REALLY stressful and when you're pregnant you want to cry all the time anyway. They've worked me in for an ultrasound this afternoon. I'll be changing my care to their office. I just really liked my midwife and am frustrated and upset that at my first visit with her, she told me she would deliver my baby, and now this. That wasn't that long ago, y'know?

I'll post later about the ultrasound.

More spotting.

Yep. Not good. It's slowed down, but is still stressing me out.

My migraine is back to some extent, although I'm taking some homeopathics and drinking more water and electrolytes, which are all supposed to help. The Tylenol helps some (might go take some), but I am not comfortable taking much Excedrin (tension headache -- just tylenol and caffeine, no aspirin, but it's a LOT of caffeine). I'm not supposed to get shots. Wondering though if the caffeine is contributing to the spotting.

I'm going to have to call Auntie Voodoo again for another craniosacral myofascial release because she did one Saturday night and I had a decent day yesterday without a headache (first time in a week). She already said she'd do another one tomorrow though ... maybe I'll just wait.

SOB FEST

Geeze -- i'm an emotional boob today, cried on DH for a while. he's doing okay, but I've been really stressed because he didn't start his pills today and he NEEDS them. He thought I was mad he was losing weight and I told him no, that I'm glad he wants to get healthier again. *sigh* Got a whole bunch off my chest. Then hung out with Kidlet. She started crying, asked what was wrong ... she's worried she won't get alone time with mommy after the baby comes because I'm always working now and will have to give all the attention to the baby. I told her I would try and be better about making sure I spend more time with her, too, and that she can always tell me when she's feeling lonely. THEN she says, "But I won't want to take time away from the baby!" Sweet kid, she just stresses a lot. Gosh, she might be related to me. I think she's feeling better -- talked about how she's been my buddy for 9 years now, since I started feeling her wiggling inside me, and that I'd be lost without her. She started crying and said, "That's good to hear. You're very close to me." She's very close to me, too.

I know having this baby is the right thing and we will have lots of blessings, not just the baby itself, but our love as a family will grow, and we'll be closer. But when she's so upset, even though she's wanted a sibling since she was TWO, I start doubting a bit. She's been an only child her whole life and the last two years have had huge changes for her -- my heart surgery, getting a daddy and a sister, losing the sister, having a visit with the sister and realizing she doesn't like her so much (she loves her, they just had a hard time over the summer), then daddy having a hard time with his meds ...

I just wonder if I'm doing a good job as her mom since she's so stressed out that I won't love her as much or make time for her when the baby comes. *sob* She's my baby!! How can I NOT love her? I'll even love her when she's a teenager and gives me more gray hair!!! She's a good girl and I know we'll all be okay, but in some ways, this seems harder on her than when she thought I was going to DIE because of my heart: I'll still be here and she's worried I won't love her. At least if I had died, she'd always have known I loved her. *sigh* I have to be more conscientious about where I'm spending my time now -- work when I'm supposed to be working so I can earn the money we need right now, play when I'm supposed to be playing, sleep when I'm supposed to be sleeping, and make sure I'm taking care of her and hubby and the baby.

Ahhhhh ... sassifaction ...

And no spotting. YAY.

Spotting is very scary when pregnant. very relieved I had none today after last night. lol

Cravings. Pregnancy Cravings.

You know those stories about the pickles and ice cream, and the wife sends the hubby out to get it or she's going to kill him? Yeah. Only I can't send DH out to get it right now because his meds for his bipolar are making him dizzy, so we have to go see the doctor next week again for that.

At any rate, I've had the weirdest cravings since I got pregnant, before I even knew. I'm still just barely pregnant (8 weeks, 1 day today), and the baby has taken over my body. I never had them like this with kiddo. Hostess lemon pies one night, sure. But NOTHING like this.

At first, it was mildish. French's fried onions, right out of the can. Ate some in bed one night while watching a movie when DH was at work. He wasn't too happy about the crumbs. Cherry pie filling. Wanted it out of the can, but made a dessert instead. Twice. And I shared them both with DH. And one night I did send hubby out at 11:30 at night for a Whopper because I needed MEAT. (this was before he had the med reactions). He brought home a double with fries and root beer and I ate it in about 30 seconds, handing him the last bite or two. He just stared at me. I ate so much meat that week -- pork roast, beef roast, steak ... I don't usually eat red meat much, so he was shocked. I just kept telling him it's his baby.

Last week sometime, I ate chili and whole wheat pancakes with syrup for breakfast. Chili in a bowl with cheese and fat free sour cream, pancakes on a plate, and never in my mouth at the same time, but I had to have them both.

Hawaiian pizza. Had a couple of pieces the other night at my sister's house because I've been craving pizza and that was the one choice I could actually eat. I had to buy one two days later and ate most of it myself over the next two days (hubby had a few slices) because I NEEDED that pineapple and can't eat pineapple unless it's been cooked more than once (it makes my throat swell shut if it's fresh or just canned, but on pizza, it's fine).

Rice and beans. Ordered a combo plate from the local Mexican place (Beto's) the other night. ALL I ate was the rice and beans. Couldn't stand the rest of it. In fact, I could eat a huge pile of both of these still and may go get some later. Hubby finished off the combo for me the next day since the smell of it in the fridge was making me nauseated.

Today, I HAD to have a PB sandwich. We'd run out of PB a couple of weeks ago, and I didn't want to stir up the new jar (I buy all natural PB from Adam's and it is separated when you get it, so you have to mix it and then refrigerate it). I made hubby do it for me. Made a sandwich with a little raspberry jam and downed it like it was candy or something. Not more than an hour later, I could smell MUSTARD and had to have it. Fried an egg, made a piece of toast, slapped some mayo and mustard on that puppy, folded it up and ate two bites. Gave the rest to hubby as the two bites fixed the craving and the tummy quit grumbling.

At least I've quit eating roasts by myself.

And the most bizzare thing? I haven't gained any weight. Strangely, hubby has. hahahaha ...

Okay, okay. I gained some weight on Clomid, and then later bounced up to 255 on a bad constipation day, but I've floated between 248 and 252 since then, depending on my constipation (which apparently the new prenatal the midwife gave me is helping with a bit ...). I had been floating around 250 from the Clomid, so yeah. Anyway. Some days I don't eat much. Or there was the day I ate a bag of cinnamon bears because that's all I could stand to put in my mouth. But hello, this had better get under control once my nausea goes away ... Hubby would really like it if I could cook at night, too, because he's had to make dinner a lot lately since that's when I'm sickest.

First Prenatal Visit

I saw the midwife yesterday! They gave me a bunch of stuff, samples of prenatals and other things they want me on, and gave me the book What to Expect When You're Expecting, which I almost bought a while back but decided not to. YAY! She also did an ultrasound and recorded it on DVD, so when DH wakes up later and DD is home, they'll get to see the baby, too. There is only one baby (whew) which is measuring right on for my dates, and the heartbeat is 168 bpm. She said everything looked good, but because I'm mildly high risk (I had heart surgery 18 months ago, had gestational diabetes with DD), she wants me to see the OB as well, which I figured would happen. My BP is elevated a bit, so she's having me go back in 10 days to get rechecked and do some blood work. Of course, if you fight with your husband for two days before an appt, your BP will be elevated, but still, better to be cautious ... lol. (side note: we're fine now)

So ... YAY! mostly. I'd had spotting around Christmas time ... Every time we were intimate. I didn't necessarily think it was a miscarriage (pink and brown spotting) but was pretty freaked out. Called the office, and they said no nookie for a week, try again, and then if it happened again to let her know. After the week, we tried again. The first time was okay, but after the second, the spotting was the worst yet. Probably pushed our luck, but hey, my libido is through the roof right now! At any rate, I did talk to the midwife about it and she said to wait a couple more weeks before we try again because of the spotting ... I'd felt a bump on my cervix while checking CP the month we conceived, and of course asked her about it. She told me I have a Bartholin's cyst, and she'd known about it from before, and that it is pretty common and normal. It might also be what is causing the spotting. I had a tiny bit pink discharge after the ultrasound which, of course, was vaginal. So we'll wait.

I did have a brief moment of panic right before the ultrasound that they were going to look and not see anything in my uterus, but calmed myself pretty quickly, reminding myself I haven't had a period in 2 months and I definitely FEEL pregnant, but I was very much relieved when she found the baby right off, too. lol